your way and i don't care .

Maybe this is your only way to treat me, the only little trouble maker in your life. I'm making such faces, doesn't mean i hate you. walking faster than me, and leaving me behind. i'm trying to stop, but you still continue your walk. yes i'd stop communicate with you. but then what's wrong with you, leaving me just like you don't care at all? telling you that i'm going somewhere else, and yet you don't even act like you care.

But then, you have to know something. i'm going out tonight not just because of my own business, it's because i can't study due to lack of concentration and mood, and the most significant thing is, i wanna see you . My last paper is on Sunday, but still, i don't start on studying yet. i don't care bout my result next. and yet, i don't care if i didn't get dean's list for this semester. I DON'T CARE. i know i do not did my best for this sem. yeah, i didn't manage my time wisely.  what to do. there's only one paper left.Allah knows better, what is actually i'm enduring right now . thank you .

between sakit hati and masalah yang menekankan

i would rather choose untuk sakit hati, which means bila problems dah settle, ataupun things that are not affecting myself.  Memang lah sakit hati tu still affect my heart, but still, it is better than masalah yang datang bertimpa2. aku tak minta orang respect aku, and yet, treat people as how you wanna be treated. that is the right wayyyy. Orang cakap, jauh perjalanan, luas pengetahuan. yea, itu sangat betul. Lagi jauh aku dari family aku, aku semakin nampak onar sebenar kehidupan yang aku sedang alami.

I don't judge people by just looking at their appearance. kau nak gedik ke, kau nak perasan hot ke, kau nak perasan bagus ke, i don't care. kadang2 orang macam ni lah yang boleh buat kita aware about ourselves. Once kita dah dapat kawan, in the other word is sahabat, appreciate. jangan silap langkah. tahu kan what are the effects kalau kita sakitkan hati orang, buat orang menangis.

Aku suka cakap 'relax, Allah ada'.  yea, once i said this phrase, aku akan rasa tenang, lupa akan masalah even untuk sekejap. kalau boleh, aku nak jadi kawan yang paling disenangi, being helpful for my friends. sebab aku tahu, what is the feeling when we are being ignored. Ignorance is a great torture, tambah2 bila kawan sendiri. Once aku dah yakin 100% dengan kawan2 aku, i will feel relieve. sebab, kawan2 lah yang selalu ada dengan kita, tambah2 bila jauh dari family.

and yea, aku lebih rela untuk sakit hati, daripada tension fikir pasal masalah yang entah ada jalan penyelesaian atau tak. Alah, macam jawab maths la. Bila aku tak study, confirm2 lah tak boleh jawab paper kan? meaning, aku akan tension habis fikir macam mana nak selesaikan soalan tu. But bila dah dapat result, even ianya menyakitkan hati sebab teruk, itu lebih baik daripada nak fikir jalan penyelesaian tadi.  Thus, aku pilih untuk sakit hati, daripada takde jalan untuk selesaikan masalah yang buat aku tertekan.  sekian, terima kasih .

sorry lah .

It is not because the stupid jealousy thingy, it was all about the way you are treating me. FUFU.  There's two paths in front of me, which one is wisely to be chose? i am not really sure about it.  Sometimes the first one seems bitter, and sometimes it seems better than the second one.  To make a wise decision in your life, it is not as easy as ordering ABC at the Mak Timah's stall.  people change, and it may shows a fluctuate effect in a linear graph, if there's a person doing a research on these irregular changes on people in this universe .  gimme the proves, if you really ever want me to be the only rose . If this is really the way that you have chose, to treat me, it will be VERY, and TOO fine for me.  i'd never put 100% trust on those, the men which most of the people will call EX.  But you, you're different. you've got my 99% of my trust.  kbye .